Since my early teen years I have battled the black dog of depression and anxiety. There were times when I was completely depleted by the heavy on set of emotion. I was stuck in mind-sand for many years sinking deeper into dis-empowerment and self pity. In a desperate search to uplift myself I searched for helping hands to pull me out of the goo. I began to learn ways I could navigate myself back to empowerment.
The most life changing discovery for me along my journey was the realization that my depression was linked to my inner energy. I learned that all emotion is energy. Emotion equals energy-in-motion. What this meant for my depression was an understanding that the heaviness I felt was actually depleted and negative energy, not necessarily an emotion from within me.
This had such a massive impact on my healing as instead of my focusing on why I was feeling depressed (which was always the same disempowering self-pity sob story) my focus shifted to understand what energy I had taken on and how I can lift it.
Being a highly sensitive person and an empath by nature, I realized that I was like a sponge to my world, absorbing emotions all around me. Without awareness of this process, negative emotions were being depressed into my system causing a depression of negativity. By redefining my depression in this way, I discovered powerful tools to clear my energy and avoid the burnout of empathy fatigue.
This can be a tough time of year for many people. With end of year budgets, social commitments, end of year school concerts and final Christmas shopping, the pace is on and it can be super stressful.
The problem with the super stress is that it drains our joy and instead of being completely present and engaged in what we are doing we can find ourselves feeling scattered, drained, irritable, burnt out, short tempered and emotional.
There is one technique I use every day that instantly brings me calm and returns me to joy, peace and happiness. No matter how ridiculous my ego-fear may get, when I use this technique it instantly brings me back to centre. This single technique uses one energizing emotion which shifts your attitude. Instantly you will be able to see a situation from a different perspective and have a positive reframe to focus on. If you read my last post on breaking the cycle of negative thinking, than you know the importance of a reframe.
Flipping your focus towards this emotion has magical effects…All you need to do is shift your focus towards appreciation and poof… you have an Attitude of Gratitude. Gratitude is the antidote to stress as you will begin to see how much you have as opposed to what you feel you do not have. Your Attitude of Gratitude will instantly awaken you to a new, more joyous perspective.
And the best way to do this is to look at what you are stressing over and turn it into something you can feel grateful for. And so you turn your stressing’s into your blessings.
Because the pace is on and instant calm is what we need, here is a super quick exercise to help you.
Do you often find yourself stuck in negativity?
Are you ever stuck in a negative story which continuously plays in your head? Do you have any of these thoughts?
I just don’t fit in anywhere
I can’t do anything right, I am so scared to fail
I don’t have anything to offer anyone
I feel so judged by people
I can’t cope
I am not strong enough
I am scared I will let people down
Where do I belong
These may not be your exact words, but you know exactly what your negative narration is. And if you feel frustrated, isolated or weighed down by your negative thoughts well guess what…I am afraid to say that you are among a large proportion of people who feel exactly the same!
Do you know we have around 12,000- 60,000 thoughts per day. 98% of those thoughts are the same every day and about 80% of those thoughts are negative! 40 Million Americans in USA suffer from anxiety, 44% of people in the UK suffer from stress and in Australian, every year, 1 million people will suffer from Depression and about 2 million will suffer from anxiety. And whether it is stress, depression or anxiety it all starts with a negative thought! These statistics show how real and prevalent negative thinking is and how much they are effecting our lives.
We all fear failure and one of the hardest challenges we face within ourselves is moving on from times we thought we failed.
When we are stuck in a failure mindset we get caught in a list of all the things we did wrong and we beat ourselves up for not being good enough, strong enough or wise enough. And that failure mindset creates an inner story of pain, shame, blame, guilt, regret and often anger.
When I get stuck in a failure mindset, and yes I actually do, I feel immobilized and my confidence shrinks into self-pity. This inner pity party steals my inner power and takes me out of my focus and purpose because all I feel is pity and regret for myself. I feel a darkness set in, a heaviness in my body that weighs me down and leaves me feeling restless and anxious.
Not very empowering! Can you relate?
I gave myself time and self reflection and once I began to re-frame my inner story, I began to feel stronger. This meant I let go of my failure mindset and began to create a new inner story with new meaning which would encourage me and pull me out of my darkness.
Here are the best lessons I learned from my failure: Read More
You know those moments when you react mindlessly to a situation and you are left feeling dis-empowered, frustrated at yourself, let down, guilty and wishing you had thought it over a bit more before you just exploded?